I failed my legal career, but God... #2

Well, after the school's rejection, I did not stop. I continued to fight for the calling that I believed in - Christian attorneys are to serve the poor and needy. I revisited the dean's office in my third year. Then, a miracle happened. Just before my graduation, the law school finally decided to join the public interest law organization.

After I graduated from law school and took the bar, I applied for a job at a local legal aid office where I previously interned. I was sure that I would get the job because I had a really good relationship with the attorneys at the office and they knew that I was passionate about helping the poor and needy. It was my dream to work at a legal aid office. However, the legal aid office did not hire me for the job that I interviewed but instead offered me another position. I later found out that the position was sponsored by the public interest law organization that my law school had recently joined just before my graduation. If my law school had not become a member of the organization, I could not have gotten the job. I felt God opened the door for me because it was my calling to serve the poor and needy as an attorney.

October 16, 2017 was my first day as a legal fellow at the legal aid office. I gave legal advice to indigent people and represented their interest when they needed help the most. It was my dream job. I loved everything about it. I even wished that I could work at a legal aid office until I retire.

But, the inevitable unexpectedly came. In March 2018, I received an email from the sponsoring organization. I found out that I was about to be laid off because the funding for the program was going to be terminated. I was scared. I panicked. My daughter Yura was just born in February 2018, and I had to provide for my family. While I was freaking out, submitting job applications to hundreds of places, I remembered that I'd always wanted to work at a courthouse. I remembered I actually wrote my first cover letter (as a practice) to a magistrate’s office. I checked the court’s website, saw a few magistrate positions opened in Fairfax County and Prince William County, and applied to one of the positions.

After I applied for the magistrate position, I found out that the position was not an "attorney-exclusive" but only "JD-advantage" position. Even while being desperate, I was too prideful to take a non-attorney position. God then showed me Exodus 18:21-23.

“But select capable men from all the people – men who fear God, trustworthy men who hate dishonest gain – and appoint them as officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. Have them serve as judges for the people at all times, but have them bring every difficult case to you; the simple cases they can decide themselves. That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.”

The verses humbled me. It taught me that a magistrate’s work may not an "attorney-exclusive" job, but without the magistrate’s work, the entire justice system would not work. I then decided to surrender my own pride for the greater good in response to God's teaching through Exodus.

Ironically, I truly enjoyed being a magistrate. I loved what I did as a magistrate even more than what I did at my first job. My co-workers and chief were fantastic. I respected most, if not all, people working with me. However, the job started to affect my health. My normal working schedule was from 8 p.m. to 6 a.m. starting from Wednesday evening to Sunday morning. I started to feel pain in my left knee and my left eye. I was, again, scared. I was only 28 years old at that time, but I could feel that my body was slowly breaking down.

At that time, I was also invited to serve as an assistant pastor at a local church. This new ministry opportunity required me to remain available on Sunday from morning to evening (as a normal pastor position would do so). I could not serve as a magistrate and assistant pastor at the same time because working as a magistrate required me to work (and sleep) on Sunday. It would be another story to share how and why I decided to take the invitation, but at the time, I did not have any other choice but to take the new ministry opportunity as an assistant pastor and to abandon my service as a magistrate for my physical and spiritual health.

During this transition, I asked myself, “what is my calling? What is my purpose?” I thought God called me to be a legal aid attorney during law school, and God gave me the job. God then took away my first job from me and gave me another job, allowing me to contribute to the cause of helping the poor and needy in a different way. God again took away the second job from me. Through prayer and meditation, it became clear that my calling was in ministry. From the beginning, my calling had been in ministry and only in ministry. My secular jobs were only to allow me to do more ministry and not to hinder me from doing it. However, at some point in my life, I lost my original purpose. I deceived myself that being attorney in itself was a calling for me. This was the necessary lesson for me before I moved on to the next stage of my life.

To be continued.

Taeho